Hi! I’m Becky from the Dementia Care Specialists Facebook Page. Kim has invited me to share tips from our friends and fans to help others who share the same experiences.

We recently posted things people should never say to caregivers, courtesy of AgingCare.com. Our community of caregivers had a lot to say about that!

So what should people say to caregivers, or do to help them out? We asked, and our community answered. Check out some of the responses below, and please add your own here or on the Facebook post.

  1. "You are doing such a miraculous job."
  1. "Take care of the caregiver. While some close friends of ours were going through a difficult time taking care of one of their family members, we tried to take care of them in any way we could. Whether it was getting their mail while they were out of town, bringing them dinner, walking their dog or mowing their lawn, these were easy ways we could help them feel taken care of while they were giving everything to the person they were taking care of."
  1. "Well done and is there anything I can do to help give you some 'me' time?”
  1. "I was recently told by a doctor that even though I was doing a noble thing caring for my grandmother, I was not qualified and she should be in an institution, and it would make his job easier. What should have been said: ‘You are doing a great job, and here are more resources for you to help you with your load. If you need me or have any questions, feel free to call me.’”
  1. "Let me sit with your grandfather so you can go out with your husband and son."
  1. "What do you need to help you?"
  1. "Just let us know that we are doing the best possible for the person we are caring for. I am sure people don't realize that 24/7 means just that!"
  1. “Keep up the good work."
  1. "Offer to help out with cleaning/shopping, etc. Buy the caregiver a small gift. Sit and listen but don't criticize."
  1. "Don't just ask how the person who's being cared for is. Always ask how the care provider is. Chances are the caregiver is in need of a hug and support from someone who really does understand we all do a fantastic job.”
  1. "I appreciate your sacrifice."
  1. "Thank you!"

More resources:

  • “You shouldn’t feel guilty about making sure your own needs are met.” Read Take Off the Cape to find out how even a superhero would struggle with the dual role of being a care partner and loved one.
  • We believe every single one of us can help persons with dementia and their families. Are you with us? Sign the pledge to help create a Dementia Capable Society!
  • Get words of inspiration and wisdom about families, care facilities, and more on our Alzheimer’s & Dementia Care YouTube playlist.        
  • Get more resources to help you provide high-quality dementia care.